Unbound Grace: Ben Affleck, Unworthiness and “The Way Back”

The above image and below quotes are taken from a New York Times article written by Brooks Barnes on Tuesday.

It’s not just a Hollywood problem… but you knew that

The New York Times published an article yesterday, “Ben Affleck Tried to Drink Away the Pain. Now He’s Trying Honesty”. Affleck shares the following insight:

“People with compulsive behavior, and I am one, have this kind of basic discomfort all the time that they’re trying to make go away… You’re trying to make yourself feel better with eating or drinking or sex or gambling or shopping or whatever. But that ends up making your life worse. Then you do more of it to make that discomfort go away. Then the real pain starts. It becomes a vicious cycle you can’t break. That’s at least what happened to me.”

Affleck is 100% right about the vicious cycle of attempting to run away from pain through trying to “make yourself feel better”. Our performance will never be enough; our own attempts at self-righteousness will never satisfy.

Affleck’s struggle is not uncommon… If you have more than 10 people age 12 or older on your row in church this Sunday, there is a good chance that one of them is struggling with substance use disorder.

My friend “Bill” is a lot like Ben Affleck…

He and his family are struggling – wife, young kids and parents – due to his substance abuse. He has been in active addiction for the better part of a decade now. You might know him, he lives in a great neighborhood, he’s a respected professional, and things look nearly perfect on the outside. The likelihood that you know someone like him is very high. Without spiritual intervention he may lose everything.

Bill’s battle is real.

The symptoms of his deeper wounds manifest themselves through substance abuse. Just like Ben Affleck, this is how he masks his feelings of inadequacy, unmet expectations, relational frustrations, social and financial pressures. Maybe you have been there…

Do you ever feel like you are not good enough or not worthy of love?

I believe that many of us have the same struggles that Bill and Ben Affleck have – not necessarily the substance abuse – but the feeling of inadequacy and being unlovable. Often this feeling that we are “not enough” or “unworthy” prevents us from approaching God’s Throne of Grace.

But here’s the scary part:

In our own righteousness we are not worthy because there is no good in us apart from Jesus. Ouch!

Here’s the deepest truth:

We come to him despite our many failings, in spite of our shame and guilt, even in spite of our success.

How?

By God’s UNBOUND GRACE. God shows his love for us like this:

While we were unworthy, CHRIST DIED FOR US!

A verse from the hymn “Come Ye Sinners” captures this dynamic of UNWORTHINESS:

 Let not conscience make you linger,

Nor of fitness fondly dream;

All the fitness He requires,

Is to feel your need of Him.

This He gives you, this He gives you,

‘Tis the Spirit’s rising beam.

Are you worthy? YES – because of Christ; He doesn’t require fitness from you. You only have to feel your need of him. You only have to see that his worthiness is sufficient for you.

Please pray for Bill – God is working in his heart.